A life well spent a life well lived.Rest in peace Mary. X Condolences to the family. Julie and family.

There is now a massive hole in our ‘Sheffield family’ since you departed. You made such a difference to our lives. You were much loved and life will not be the same without you. Thinking of you always. You will never be forgotten and always remembered fondly for the great kindness you have always shown myself and my family. Jennifer Gerrard (sister-in-law)

23 years ago, Mary sent me this poem following the death of my dad. I share it with all who are grieving her death at this time. Shan. An Ocean of Grief. Ferna Lary Mills. I cautiously watch the water as it moves along the shore creeping closer to the sand around my feet. Beyond the crashing waves where the water is deepest green the ocean mirrors the depths of my grief. My grief is like the ocean, sorrow coming in like waves, sometimes gentle like a ripple on the sea. Other times it just engulfs me with crushing waves of sadness and undertows of despair pull down on me. Some days I wade out in it, splashing memories with my feet, recalling days of sunshine on my face stepping through the foamy edges never venturing out so far that larger waves can threaten their embrace. Then when I least expect it this freak of nature soaks me in reality so painful that I fall. The sorrow and the anger that I’ve fought with day to day surge through me in a tidal free-for-all. One day when I’m much stronger and my grief is not so new I’ll swim just like I used to do before. I’ll take pleasure in the memories and tread water in those places that we can’t share together anymore.